So I've been on the hunt for jobs, and trying to be a little unconventional. I've had several suggestions to be more forward with employers and basically call them up and say, I'm a good fit for your firm, can I come and interview with you.
While this is utterly terrifying for me, I recently had the opportunity to find out that a local firm was hiring. The firm only has four attorneys in it, but I found out from one of the main partner's wives (i.e. his name is on the sign) that they might be hiring another attorney because they have an excess of work.
In the interest of brevity, I called yesterday and the attorney called me back today. After some discussion, and telling him I a) just took the bar exam, b) have only worked in criminal law, and c) only have experience in civil litigation through law school competitions and clinics, he asked me to send him a resume. He then proceeded to tell me they have been in talked with but "hadn't closed the deal" with an attorney with 3 years experience. Being up against that person doesn't leave me with much hope, but I guess its a good thing he still asked for a resume after learning I have no experience doing what they do. I mean, I guess he could have just said thanks but no thanks.
So, in the meantime, I've been working on my confidence and trust and trying to embrace my full potential. I got really upset a few days ago at feeling really left out with a certain group of people. One person in particular I don't really care for all that much, and that made me even more upset. I felt the need to try to be super happy, excited, etc., to fit in, despite not being included. After talking with BC, if people don't want to spend time with me, so be it. Honestly I'm kinda tired of trying SO HARD to fit in. By the same token, I've got a lot of "me" things to work on--specifically learning to put myself out there and not worry about what other people think. I used to be confident and it went away. I want to find it again.
Also, last thing--as of yesterday, I'm officially training for a half-marathon!! I'm so excited!!