I keep thinking about what its going to be like.

When July 28th rolls around, when I hear that time is up. When Question #100 has been answered for the third and FINAL time in that two day timespan.

When I'm driving back to the hotel, thinking that all I can do now is wait.

When I go to sleep like that night, knowing its all over.

When I wake up and wander out to the beach...lay on the sand and let the sound of the waves completely take over my thoughts for the first time in three years.

When I get back to my house and put away all the bar review stuff, up in the closet, and completely out of sight and out of mind.

When I get to go back to work and actually WORK...because I'm *gasp* actually looking forward to it.

When I get my results...

Its all a bit overwhelming. Now that I'm not working, I feel a load off my shoulders and I can concentrate on all this like I'm supposed to. But beyond that, in 41 days, just 41, my life will be so incredibly different. 41 seems so short. Three years ago, June/July 2010 seemed like an eternity away. And now, here it is. I can't believe how fast time has flown. And while all this is incredibly frightening, a couple of times today while I was reading, I just stopped and thought--this is actually completely doable. Yes, it is three hours of essays followed by 100 MC. And yes, there is another day of 100 MC, morning and afternoon. And yes, my head is going to explode with all this information. But this is totally doable.

And I'm going to do it.


Lacey said...

Alicia you can do it!! I'm so proud of you!

*uncorked said...

I can't even accurately describe how amazing the feeling will be, because you truly have to experience it. I was so jacked up to be done with it that I met some friends out and had a great night after the last day. Then I went to the Cayman Islands for two weeks. It was weird, the first few days when I realized I had NOTHING to study. NOTHING to worry about (because you have to just let go and wait for results - nothing you can do at that point).

Then when the results came I went through all the emotions - I was petrified while looking to find my test number on the PASS list. I threw up as the page was loading because OF COURSE it took forever. Then I laughed, then I cried, then I checked my number and the list approximately 75 more times that day. Called other friends to check from their computers just in case it showed up on mine and not theirs.

Also, even better than the day the results came in was the day I was sworn in. It FINALLY felt like that chapter was closed.

Push through these last few weeks and you will be rewarded :) GOOD LUCK!! Sorry for the long-winded comment here but I just found you!

Faux Trixie said...

You'll be FINE. I don't know what state you're sitting for, but I took the Illinois bar exam which is supposed to be hard. Don't get me wrong, it WAS, but it was doable, you know? You just focus for 16 hours and then you're done.

Enjoy the time AFTER the bar while you can, because the real world isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Good luck!